The Octagon. A 6 foot high steel cage that surrounds MMA fighters to contain their mayhem. Just as important, once you’re in, you’re in. There is nowhere to run. The wrestling takedowns and punches to the head only stop when the recipient stops breathing consciously.

There are so many people I’d love to lock in the cage with me. Lessons need to be taught, and I am one hell of a teacher…

June Edition

NUMBER 5: Perez Hilton
There are so many reasons why I want to put him in a figure four leg lock. Nothing worse than a no talent writer to make tons of money by writing about celebrity garbage. And its bad enough that he was brought into pageants to ask questions as if he was a real journalist. But the media circus that surrounded his attack by the black eyed peas was absolutely comical. You can only poke a dog so many times with a stick before it reacts and attacks. I’m glad he got slugged. But I’d give him a real reason to cry.
Watch him get smashed

NUMBER 4: Bernie Madoff
So you received 150 years in prison. That certainly doesn’t refund any type of funds that may have destroyed families. When is enough enough? How much more money do you need? Is there a difference between one billion and two billion?

NUMBER 3: Brett Favre
Go away. Go away now. Actually, no. I want you to come back. I love that you continually embarrass yourself by saying you are a team player yet create a circus around your “retirement.” Favre has had more farewell tours than the Rolling Stones.

NUMBER 2: Courts that are suing for music downloads
Grow up. That’s all that can be said. You made an example of a woman who has ZERO chance of paying the hundreds in thousands of fines that you ordered. We’ve been ripped off by the music industry long enough. I’ve bought my share of Led Zeppelin albums. I think I should be entitled to download “Tangerine” if I want it on my iPod and I lost the CD.

NUMBER ONE: The people that are crying for Michael Jackson
It is pathetic enough to see people cry when a celebrity that they don’t know dies. But he was a child molester. He dangled his baby out of a window. His face looks like he truly was in the Octagon already with Wanderlie Silva. So stop crying people. He didn’t know you nor care about you. Now was I sad when Paul Newman died? Yes. Not because I just loved his work. But because he donated millions to charity. What is Michael Jackson’s contribution to this planet? Do you think the parents of the children he molested are crying? Are they playing his music over and over.
I guess as long as they paid for it and didn’t download it illegally, most will accept it.